Assessing Goodness-of-Fit: Am I the Best Coach for This Client?

As coaches, we want to attract clients whose coaching goals fit with what we offer. We also want to work with clients with whom we feel a strong interpersonal connection. I refer to this as ‘goodness-of-fit’: the fit between the coach’s niche, knowledge base and coaching style; and the client’s personality (including temperament, energy and pace) and overall coaching goals. It is important to note that goodness-of-fit is relational and is determined by both the coach and the client.

When there is goodness-of-fit, a flow exists that is characterized by ease and spontaneity; a graceful dance between coach and client. When it is missing, coaching feels more effortful, and the coach may question whether the relationship is serving the client.

At times, coaches can determine goodness-of-fit in the initial contact with a prospective client. The client is motivated to move forward in his/her life; there is a connection between the coach and client that feels right; and the services offered by the coach fit with the client’s goals. The coaching proceeds successfully.

Sometimes, it is not until the relationship has gotten underway that either or both parties recognize that something isn’t quite right; the goodness-of-fit is missing. There may be one or more of the following circumstances present:

• The client is uncertain about what he wants to get from coaching.
• The client’s goals have changed, and the goodness-of-fit is no longer there.
• The coach experiences a difference in style, pace and energy with the client.
• The coach questions her effectiveness in coaching the client.
• The coach questions whether the client is ‘coachable’.

Case Examples:

Beth, a life coach, has been coaching Rob for the past four months. Rob seems motivated to achieve the goals he has set for himself. He comments regularly that he finds coaching with Beth to be beneficial. Beth, on the other hand, feels impatient as Rob’s coach. She sees him moving at a tortoise pace, making slow yet steady progress.
Beth says, “I wonder if I’m the best coach for Rob. Maybe someone else could light a fire under him or be more tolerant of his pace. I’m feeling frustrated, and I’m questioning my coaching skills!”

Diane, a career coach, has been coaching Susan for approximately one year. When their coaching relationship began, Susan was in a career transition. During the first six months of coaching, she accepted a position that she quit three months later because it was not what she had expected. Diane does not look forward to her coaching calls with Susan. She feels drained at the end of the calls. Susan rarely shows up with an agenda, and she seldom follows through with fieldwork. Diane wonders if the coaching relationship is working for either one of them.

In the examples above, both coaches were not experiencing goodness-of-fit with their clients. For Beth, her style seemed incompatible with Rob’s pace, yet he reported feeling satisfied with the coaching. For Diane, there was a lack of engagement on Susan’s part that caused her to question the benefits of the coaching. Regardless of what the specific situation is, it is crucial that coaches ask themselves the questions, “what’s getting in the way of my effectiveness?” and “what are some options that are in service of my client?”
Here are some suggestions to enable you to assess and respond to the situation:

1) Seek out a trusted mentor-coach or buddy coach: It is extremely helpful to have an objective sounding board to air concerns, ask questions and get feedback. Discussing the situation with someone who can listen objectively provides coaches with a rich opportunity to gain clarity, uncover blind spots, and feel empowered to proceed in a manner that honors themselves and their clients.

2) Check it out with the client: Simply ask your client the question, “how is the coaching working for you?” Our clients are creative, resourceful and whole. Hopefully the relationship is based on open and honest communication. Asking the question invites the client to not only reflect on the coaching for him/herself, but also gives the coach an opportunity to share his/her perspective as well.

3) Speak your truth: If you are clear that the coaching relationship is not a good fit, tell your client. At times coaches are attached to keeping clients, or they may be fearful of coming across in an ‘uncoach-like’ way. Chances are if the relationship isn’t working for you, your client will sense that something is off. Our clients deserve to be coached with integrity. See this as an opportunity to stretch out of your comfort zone and have a frank conversation.

4) Coach your client in planning for what’s next: Should you and the client decide to end coaching, you can assist the client in creating a plan for where he/she wants to go from here. Perhaps the client wants to seek out the services of another professional such as a therapist or career counselor. You may have resources on hand to offer the client. Or, the conversation might lead to a change in focus in coaching. This is an opportunity for you and the client to redesign the coaching alliance with a new direction.

Case Outcomes:

In the cases above, both coaches brought their challenges to our mentor-coaching group. Beth talked about her impatience with Rob’s slower pace. After processing her reaction with the group, Beth recognized that her relationship with Rob provided her with an opportunity to flex her style and slow down. For Susan, processing with the group helped her to decide to ask her client, Diane, how the coaching was working. They had a meaningful conversation that resulted in Diane’s decision to take a break from coaching. Both coaches were pleased with the outcome of their decisions.